DrYving Miss Kitty
by Matt Briddell
Summary: Chapter 6 is up. Enjoy the ending! After X-Treme Measures, Kitty's escapades behind the wheel lead to her landing a job as a stunt driver! Is Hollywood ready for this? Thanks for all the reviews so far :-)
1. 4 Wheel DrYve

Note: I do not own any of the X-Men, or Hollywood (but oh the fun I'd have with both!)  
  
This was inspired by Red Witch, and picks up right at the end of "X-Treme Measures" Kitty's driving lands her a job as a Hollywood stunt driver! Will Kitty bring down the house, or just crash into it? Enjoy!  
  
Xavier wheeled away from Sharp as the beverage maker waved back at him and walked back inside his factory. Hopefully, this would be the end of all the troubles that Sharp's drink, "Power-8" was causing. He wheeled down to his limo, and the back door opened up automatically and a special ramp for his wheelchair extended. After a few moments, he was situated in the back seat. "Take us home, Logan," he said.  
  
The person in the driver's seat turned, and Xavier saw, to his horror, that it was not Logan under the red chauffeur's cap, but Kitty. "Sorry, but Logan's back at the Institute," she said. "But it's ok, he said I could drive!" She started up the car and gunned the engine as Xavier vainly tried to open the door before it was too late. With a squeal of tires, the limo roared away from the factory, leaving a cloud of dust and strips of burnt rubber in its wake.  
  
A half hour later, the limo pulled up to the front of the Xavier Institute, but it was in a much less pristine condition than it had been in when it had left its garage earlier in the day. Two of the tires had been cut down, there were numerous dents in the front fender and both quarter-panels, and the small figurehead that sat atop the hood was bent at a 45o angle. Kitty got out of the car. "That was like, SO much fun, professor! I can't wait to drive again!" She giggled and ran inside the house.  
  
Xavier slowly got out of the car and surveyed the damage to his limo. "I just had it restored!" he moaned, clutching the sides of his head.  
  
Logan had watched the limo arrive back home from the front porch. "Payback is so-ooo good!" he chuckled to himself. He walked up behind Xavier. "Have a good trip, Chuck?" he asked.  
  
Xavier groaned. Logan had gotten him back, and good. But he wasn't about to let Logan have the last laugh. "Logan, I'm glad to see you. I have an announcement to make and I want you to be the first to hear it. Until Kitty gets her driver's license, I am declaring the Institute to be a dry campus!"  
  
Logan narrowed his eyes. No beer? He'd go insane!  
  
"You wouldn't!" he growled.  
  
Xavier simply shrugged his shoulders as if to say, "Try me,"  
  
"I can't believe you'd do this, Charles!" Logan cried. "You know what this is going to do to me!"  
  
"Well, I might consider making a few exceptions to that policy, IF you do me one small favor," Xavier said.  
  
"What's that?" Logan asked suspiciously.  
  
"Become Kitty's driving instructor, full time," Xavier said.  
  
Logan gritted his teeth as he considered his choices. Go without beer until the half-pint got her license, or put his life on the line and teach her himself. Both options were extremely distasteful to say the least. Finally, he picked his poison and said, "Alright Charles, you win. I'll teach the kid how to drive,"  
  
"Excellent," grinned Xavier, and wheeled inside the mansion.  
  
"This job better have hazard pay!" Logan called after him.  
  
Up next: Hollywood's had its fair share of monsters, but can it handle. Kitty's driving? 


	2. Kitty Kitty Bang Bang

Logan sat in the passenger seat of an old sedan outside Bayville High, waiting for Kitty to come out so they could begin their next driver's lesson. He had decided to play it smart and had gotten this car from a junkyard- no sense in having Kitty tear up any more of the Institute's vehicles. He steeled himself as Kitty walked out of the school and opened the driver's door.  
  
"Hi, Mr. Logan!" she said.  
  
Logan shuddered. That voice of hers when she got excited always made him cringe. To him, it was worse than the sound of fingernails on a chalkboard.  
  
"Ok, Kitty" he said. "This lesson's simple. Traffic's light so we won't need to take any detours. Just drive us home, nice and easy. And NO PHASING!!!" he finished.  
  
"Jeez, ok!" said Kitty, rolling her eyes. "You take all the fun out of driving!"  
  
"I don't find near-death experiences to be fun," said Logan. Kitty started the car and, to Logan's relief, gently rolled out of the Bayville parking lot.  
  
"See, I'm not such a bad driver," said Kitty. "It's been 5 whole minutes and I haven't hit any- Hey! Watch it, bonehead!" she yelled as another car cut her off.  
  
"Relax, Kitty!" said Logan. "Ya know, you really need to work on your temper when you're behind the wheel,"  
  
"I do NOT have a temper!" shouted Kitty back, narrowly missing a school bus as it changed lanes.  
  
Logan decided not to argue any more. "Whatever you say," he said. "Turn left here, I wanna go through downtown,"  
  
Kitty turned the corner and managed not to jump the curb. Logan sighed in relief; this lesson was actually going well for once. Maybe this is my lucky day, he thought. Suddenly, he heard a whine of sirens from behind him and, looking in the rear-view mirror, saw a blue sports car rapidly closing from behind, pursued closely by a trio of police cars. Or maybe not, he finished his thought.  
  
"I didn't do anything!" said Kitty nervously.  
  
"Just pull out of their way," said Logan. "I don't think they're after us,"  
  
"Why do you say that?" asked Kitty just as the sports car flew by them.  
  
"That's why," said Logan, gesturing at the car.  
  
"Hey, let's follow them!" said Kitty. "Maybe we can help them out!"  
  
"Kitty, no! Let the cops handle it!" Logan shouted, but Kitty had already floored the accelerator, and he was now just a passenger on another one of Kitty's wild rides.  
  
Kitty followed closely behind the police cars as they chased the sports car. They flew through the streets of Bayville. Kitty pulled ahead of the police and got alongside the sports car long enough to glance over at the driver. She saw that the driver was wearing a helmet and some kind of suit. "Why's he wearing a helmet?" she wondered to herself. Suddenly, the driver of the sports car veered left down a narrow alley, too fast for Kitty to react. The cops turned down the alley after the sports car, leaving Kitty and Logan alone by themselves.  
  
"Ok, enough fun. Let's go home," Logan insisted.  
  
"Wait a minute, I know a shortcut! We can catch up to him!" said Kitty and hit the gas, the whine of the engine drowning out Logan's protests.  
  
Up in the sky, a helicopter had been watching the action below. A camera rigged up on one of the landing struts had captured the events. Inside the helicopter, two men sat holding copies of a script for an action movie. One of the men pulled off his headphones and turned to the other. "Who was driving that other car down there? That's not supposed to be in the script!"  
  
The second man, the film's director, took off his own headphones. "I know, but whoever it is was doing some good driving down there. Let's just watch and see what happens," In truth, the director was glad for this new development. He hadn't been entirely happy with his current stuntman, Gordon Crane, who had been complaining about some of the more dangerous stunts that the film called for. Perhaps this new person would make a suitable replacement.  
  
Kitty power-slid the car around a corner and onto a side street, slamming Logan up against the passenger door. "No amount of beer is worth this!" he thought to himself. "Look out!" he cried as Kitty swerved through traffic, slamming into a row of garbage cans and spilling their contents into the street.  
  
"Oops, sorry," she said, and then cut the car hard to the right, veering across two lanes of traffic. "Look, there he is!" she cried as she caught sight of the sports car again. She swung in behind him and clung tightly to his bumper. The driver of the car veered left and right, but was unable to shake Kitty off his tail. Kitty pulled up along side of him, and the driver of the car slammed his car into hers. Kitty tried to pull away, but their fenders had gotten locked together. Logan looked ahead to see a car trailer parked at a stoplight, its ramp lowered down onto the street.  
  
"I hope you see that!" Logan shouted.  
  
Kitty struggled with the steering wheel, but could not break free from the other car as they drew closer and closer to the ramp. At the last second, both drivers managed to break free of each other. The driver of the sports car spun out and crashed into a mailbox, sending letters flying everywhere. Kitty screamed as her car drove up the ramp of the car carrier and launched into space. The car did a complete barrel-roll in mid air and landed in the middle of an intersection about 100 feet away. Kitty jerked the wheel hard left and the car spun around in a complete circle and came to rest on the sidewalk.  
  
"Woo-hoo!" Kitty yelled as she climbed out of the car. "Did you see that?"  
  
Logan fought back a violent wave of nausea and staggered out of the car. "That's it! No more driving for you, ever! I don't care if Chuck takes away all my beer! This is pure torture!"  
  
His rant was interrupted by the sound of spinning blades. He looked up to see the movie helicopter land in the street and saw two men hop out. "Great. Now what?" he muttered.  
  
The film director walked up to Kitty and Logan. "Which one of you just did that?" he asked.  
  
"Um, I did," Kitty said sheepishly.  
  
The director was flabbergasted. "Young lady, that was some of the best driving I've seen in my life!"  
  
"You've got to be kidding me!" Logan shouted. "She nearly got us killed!"  
  
"Can somebody PLEASE tell me what just happened?" asked a newcomer. Everybody turned to see the driver of the blue sports car running up, holding his helmet in his hand. "This was supposed to be just the cops chasing me, not her!" he yelled furiously.  
  
"Can it, Gordon," said the director, and then turned back to Kitty. "Young lady, how'd you like to work as a stunt driver for my movie? I'll pay you $5000,"  
  
"Are you serious? I'd love to!" said Kitty.  
  
"What?" Logan and Gordon yelled at the same time, unable to believe their ears. The stunt driver recovered first.  
  
"Howard, you can't just ask some little KID to stunt drive! There's no way she'd be able to do half the stuff you're asking for!" he shouted.  
  
"Gordon, I know talent when I see it, and right now I'm looking at somebody who isn't afraid to drive a car. You're fired!"  
  
Gordon was incredulous. "You can't fire me! I have a contract!"  
  
"And I've just renegotiated it. Take a hike!" shouted the director.  
  
Gordon glared at the director. "You haven't seen the last of me," he threatened, and stalked off.  
  
Logan spoke to the director. "Listen, bub, I don't think this is such a good idea asking her to stunt drive for you. You don't know what you're getting into,"  
  
"Nonsense, she's a natural!" said the director. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name,"  
  
"Logan," he said. "I'm her," he was going to say "driving instructor", but Kitty cut him off. "He's my agent!" she said.  
  
Logan rolled his eyes, annoyed at becoming embroiled in Kitty's little scheme.  
  
"Excellent," said the director. "Howard Foster, film director," he said, and shook Logan's hand vigorously.  
  
Logan decided to make one last-ditch effort to ward off the destruction that was sure to come of all of this. "You should REALLY get somebody else for this. She doesn't even have her driver's license yet,"  
  
"Oh, don't be ridiculous!" Foster said dismissively. "What's the worst that could happen?" he said. Then he turned back to Kitty. "Let's go talk about the script," he said, taking her arm, and they walked off to Foster's trailer.  
  
Believe me, you DON'T wanna know, thought Logan to himself as he pulled out his cell phone to call up Xavier and inform him of the latest turn in Kitty's driving escapades. Chuck was just gonna LOVE this.  
  
Next time: News of Kitty's new job spreads through the mansion, and Gordon tries to get some revenge with the help of a fiery ally. 


	3. Hot Rod, Hot Head

Note: This chapter probably merits a PG rating, for alcohol consumption and "multiple" cases of child abuse :-D  
  
"She did WHAT?" Charles Xavier yelled incredulously into his cell phone.  
  
"You heard right, Chuck," Logan said on the other end of the line. "Kitty went and got herself a job as a stunt driver for this movie they're filming in town,"  
  
Xavier groaned loudly. Just when it seemed things couldn't get ANY worse.  
  
"Can't Trask let another one of those Sentinel robots loose instead?" he asked. "I'd rather deal with 10 of those things than open tomorrow's paper to find that half of Bayville's in ruins because of Kitty's driving," he said.  
  
"Hey, it's not all bad," said Logan. "At least they're paying her,"  
  
"Paying her?" asked Xavier. That was a whole new ballgame.  
  
"Yeah. Five grand," said Logan.  
  
"Hmm," said Xavier, thoughtfully stroking his chin. With that sort of money, he could get his limo at least partially repaired. Or maybe pay to fix one of the other dozen or so things around the Institute that Kitty's driving had demolished.  
  
"Alright, Logan. I suppose Kitty can pursue this opportunity wherever it leads her," Xavier said. "But I want her closely supervised at all times!"  
  
"Don't worry Chuck, she won't get within 2 feet of a car unless I'm right next to her," said Logan.  
  
"Glad to hear it," said Xavier. "Who knows, Kitty's driving may take her all the way to Hollywood,"  
  
"Wherever, just as long as it's someplace far away from us!" said Logan, a rare laugh escaping his lips.  
  
X  
  
Gordon Crane had been drinking heavily for the last hour and a half. After being fired as the stunt driver for the movie, he had gone into the nearest bar and ordered a drink, hoping to drown his sorrows. One pint led to another, and after a while, he was ranting to anybody would listen, in increasingly slurred tones, about the injustice of the world and how a 17- year old girl had cheated him out of his career.  
  
He was so far gone that he hardly noticed when a man with flame-red hair sat down next to him at the bar. "Sounds like you've had a pretty rough day," the man observed.  
  
"You said it," Gordon mumbled back, not noticing the man's Australian accent. At that stage of intoxication, everybody sounded the same, no matter where they were from. "Darn kid cost me my job!"  
  
"Tell me about it," the man said curiously.  
  
"Here I am, filming the chase scene for this movie they're shooting in town, and this kid comes up from out of nowhere and crashes me! And then that idiot director gives her MY job!"  
  
"Tell me, what did she look like?" the man asked.  
  
Gordon described Kitty from the brief glance he had gotten of her. "Say, why are you so interested?" he asked the man.  
  
"Well, I represent a man, never mind who, who would not mind it one bit if some amount of harm were to befall this girl," he said. "Allow me to introduce myself properly. My name is St. John Allerdyce. But most people call me Pyro,"  
  
"Pyro. That's an interesting name. Irish?" Gordon asked.  
  
"Not exactly," Pyro responded. "Now what do you say I get the next round and you tell me more about this movie they're making," he said, grinning a sly grin.  
  
X  
  
Over the next few days, Kitty had intensely studied her scene for the upcoming shoot. The film was about a daring jewel thief on the run from gangsters, and this particular scene was possibly the wildest of the whole film. Kitty's eyes had gone wide with excitement the first time she had read about what one particular stunt called for.  
  
"Can you imagine, driving through a glass wall at 80 miles an hour?" she asked Kurt excitedly.  
  
"Ah, I'm trying not to!" Kurt said nervously.  
  
"Hmmph! You're no fun at all!" she said and walked off in a huff. As she walked past the kitchen, she heard Jamie and Bobby arguing over something.  
  
"What are you two arguing about?" she asked them.  
  
"Bobby doesn't think we'll be able to feel the shockwaves from here," Jamie said.  
  
"What shockwaves?" Kitty asked, confused.  
  
"The ones from all the explosions you're gonna cause tomorrow!" he said, laughing.  
  
"That is like, so NOT funny!" Kitty shouted, and kicked his chair so hard that Jamie fell over onto the floor. He landed with a thud, followed quickly by 3 other copies of himself.  
  
"See, Logan was right! She DOES have a temper!" said one of the Jamies.  
  
"AAGH!" Kitty screamed. "I do NOT have a temper!" The Jamies got up and ran out of the kitchen with Kitty in hot pursuit. Bobby could hear the sounds of a scuffle coming from the den. He could heard Kitty yelling "If I had more arms I'd smack all four of you!", and several choruses of Jamie's laughter.  
  
He poked his head in to see Kitty wrestling with one of the Jamies while the other three were hitting her with couch pillows. Bobby rolled his eyes as feathers flew everywhere.  
  
"Why can't I just live with normal people?" he asked despondently, and walked away from the feathery carnage.  
  
X  
  
Next episode: How does Lance take all of Kitty's driving? Hopefully, with some extra-strength Tylenol! 


	4. Lance Goes For A Ride

A: Kitty got mad and kicked the disclaimer saying I don't own any of the X- Men out the window. I swear, that girl and her temper.  
  
K: I HEARD THAT!!!  
  
A: Sorry! Anyway, on with the story.  
  
Kitty walked to school excitedly. Nobody had offered her a ride, probably out of fear for their own safety, but she was still happy. Today was the day of the shooting! She couldn't wait to get behind the wheel and start filming.  
  
As she waited at a crosswalk for the light to change, she noticed Lance Alvers pull up to the intersection. "Lance!" she called out.  
  
"Hey Kitty," Lance called back. "Want a ride?"  
  
"Sure! Beats walking!" she said, and climbed up onto the side of the jeep, phased through the door, and sat down in the passenger's seat.  
  
Lance noticed how bubbly she looked. "Something's got you pretty stoked today," he said.  
  
"I know! I can't wait for this afternoon!" Kitty exclaimed.  
  
"What happens this afternoon?"  
  
"You haven't heard?"  
  
"Nope,"  
  
"Well, you know that movie they're shooting in Bayville, right? I'm doing the stunt driving for it!"  
  
Lance was so surprised that he slammed on the brakes. They were both whipped forward and then slammed back against their seats.  
  
"Ow! What'd you do that for?" Kitty asked angrily.  
  
"Um, sorry, squirrel," said Lance.  
  
"I didn't see any."  
  
"So! What kind of stunts are you gonna be doing?" Lance cut her off.  
  
Kitty looked at her watch. "Well, do you want to see for yourself?"  
  
"Um, I suppose," Lance said nervously, experiencing a trembling in his stomach.  
  
"Cool! Move over," Kitty said as she phased through him into the driver's seat.  
  
"Hey!" Lance protested, feeling the girl inside of him for a moment as he moved over to the passenger seat.  
  
"Ok, hang on tight!" Kitty said and hit the gas. She accelerated to 60 miles an hour and then grabbed the hand brake while throwing the jeep into a half-turn. The jeep spun around, leaving rubber on the pavement, and wound up facing the other way. Kitty accelerated again, and threw the jeep into a hard right turn. She clipped the curb as she went around the corner, and the right side of the jeep lifted itself off of the pavement as she negotiated the turn on just two wheels. The jeep slammed back down to the pavement and Kitty stopped and looked over at Lance.  
  
"What'd you think? Lance?"  
  
Lance was sitting, mouth agape, hair shooting out in all directions, his eyes wide in shock. "Woah!" was all he could bring himself to say. He recovered and looked over at Kitty. "That was amazing! How long have you been doing this?"  
  
"I just got the job a few days ago, but I've only been driving for a couple weeks," she said.  
  
"So, um, what do you plan on doing with this?" he asked, looking into her eyes. "Think you might try and do some more movies after this one?"  
  
"Maybe," she said, gazing back into his eyes. "It might be fun to go to Hollywood after I graduate, maybe get a job out there," She started to draw closer to Lance.  
  
"Yeah," said Lance, pulling closer himself. "That would be cool. You being the first mutant in pictures,"  
  
"That anybody knew about, anyway," Kitty said, now just inches away from Lance. They drew closer, closer.  
  
Suddenly the moment was broken as a blue pickup truck drove by, horn blaring. Kitty was startled and pulled away. "Jerk!" she shouted after him. "Of all the nerve! I HATE it when people do that!"  
  
"I know. Why would anybody want to do that for?" said Lance. In her sudden anger, Kitty misinterpreted his innocent remark.  
  
"What? What'd you say? Did you say I have a temper?" she said, looking at him harshly.  
  
"Kitty." Lance protested.  
  
"Well, I don't! And we're through!" she shouted, climbing out of the car. She walked a few steps away and then turned back around. "I mean it this time!" she shouted, and walked off.  
  
Lance sighed. "Like I haven't heard THAT before," he muttered, and drove off the other way.  
  
Kitty walked down the sidewalk alone. Why was everybody saying she had a temper lately? she wondered. She looked up as a blue pick-up truck zoomed by her. She gave it no thought and kept walking. A few minutes later, another blue truck drove quickly by. Lots of blue trucks on the road today, she thought. A third blue truck zoomed by, this time coming from the opposite direction. "Is that the same one?" she wondered. Suddenly, the truck swerved and started coming straight at her. Kitty screamed and dove out of the way as the truck missed her by 6 inches.  
  
"What are you doing, you maniac?" Kitty shouted at the driver.  
  
The window of the truck opened, and Kitty could see Gordon Crane sitting behind the wheel. "You!" she shouted in surprise.  
  
"So, you thought you could just waltz on in and take my job away from me, did you? Well, now you're going to pay!"  
  
Kitty saw another man stand up in the bed of the truck. "And he's not the only one with a score to settle," the man said. From his red hair and suit, and the hoses snaking down his arms, Kitty recognized him as Pyro, one of Magneto's newest recruits. He shot a blast of fire at her, but she managed to dodge it and fled down an alley.  
  
Lance drove on in his jeep, thinking about how he was going to get Kitty back this time. That girl could be SO moody, he thought. He looked up as a blue pick-up roared by him. Wonder where the fire is, Lance thought. Lance saw the blue truck suddenly swerve off the road and nearly strike a pedestrian, who managed to dive out of the way at the last second. "What the," Lance exclaimed. He squinted, trying to make out who had barely escaped being run over. "Kitty?" He hit the gas and took off after the blue truck.  
  
She quickly realized once she got to the end that she was trapped. Turning around, she saw the truck pull up to the entrance of the alley, blocking her escape. Crane revved his engine, but before he could run Kitty down, another vehicle crashed headfirst into the side of the truck, sending it skidding down the road. Crane cursed loudly and sped off, leaving a cloud of smoke and debris behind him.  
  
Lance got out and looked at his jeep. The front end was smashed in, but he thought it would still run. "Kitty, are you alright?" he asked, running up to her.  
  
"Lance!" she shouted, and embraced him strongly.  
  
"Who was that nut chasing you? And why was Pyro with him?"  
  
"That was the guy who used to be driving for that movie. I guess he's still pretty upset," She lowered her head. "Lance, I'm sorry I lost it earlier. I guess I do have a bit of a temper,"  
  
"Hey, forget about it. I'm just glad I was able to keep that maniac from killing you," said Lance. "Why don't I take you the rest of the way to school," he offered.  
  
"Thanks, Lance," Kitty said, and gave him a peck on the cheek. She walked back to the jeep as Lance blushed heavily.  
  
As Lance pulled up out in front of Bayville High, Kitty turned to him. "Hey, Lance, why don't you come by the set after school today and watch the shoot?"  
  
"Sure," said Lance. "And who knows, maybe that crazy driver might try something again,"  
  
"Well, if he does, you can be my knight in shining armor again, charging in on your noble steed," she laughed, patting the side of the jeep.  
  
"I think this steed's about ready to be sent to the factory," Lance said, as Kitty gave him another kiss on the cheek and ran inside the school. He drove off, making a mental note to head downtown that afternoon. This was going to be a fun day.  
  
Coming up next: The fiery, action packed conclusion! 


	5. Lights, Camera, Kitty!

Disclaimer: I do not have enough money to own either the X-Men or a new T- Bird. All part of being a college student, I guess.  
  
Lance and Kitty pulled up to the filming site to find Logan already waiting for him. Logan looked at Lance suspiciously as they got out of the jeep.  
  
"What is he doing here?" Logan asked Kitty as he pulled her aside.  
  
"He's just here to watch," said Kitty.  
  
"As if I didn't have enough on my hands," Logan muttered.  
  
Kitty walked into a trailer and emerged a few minutes later wearing a gray fire proof racing suit and carrying a helmet under her arm. "Like, don't they have anything in a more Fall color?" she asked.  
  
Logan rolled his eyes. Here she was, potentially about to wreck half the city, and all she could think about was how she looked! She wasn't even going to be on camera! How vain!  
  
He grabbed her shoulder as she was getting into the car, a brand-new white T-Bird. "Ok, I won't be able to be in the car with you during any of this, so please, PLEASE just stick to the script. Don't try and improvise anything,"  
  
"Relax, Mr. Logan, everything will be fine," Kitty said.  
  
Logan didn't quite share her confidence. They'd reconfigured the Danger Room so that Kitty would be able to practice the stunts, but there was one she had still not been able to get quite right. Logan just hoped that all would go well.  
  
"Good luck, kid," he said as Kitty closed the door.  
  
The director picked up a bullhorn and turned it on. "Ok, people, it's time to film the big chase scene! Now we only have enough daylight to do this once, so it has to be absolutely perfect! Places everybody, and 3, 2, 1, action!"  
  
Kitty started up the car and waited for her cue. A half a block behind her, a woman ran out of a building, holding a bag in one hand. She opened the door of another T-Bird, identical to the one Kitty was sitting in. That was Kitty's cue to start her engine. A few seconds later, 3 black sedans pulled out from the alley behind the building, and Kitty took off, with the sedans in hot pursuit.  
  
Kitty was driving at about 60 mph. Occasionally, one of the sedans would get close enough to take a stab at her bumper, as the script called for, but for the first couple minutes, she was able to stay ahead. The movie called for the gangsters to try and intimidate the jewel thief at this point, and that's exactly what an observer would have seen.  
  
She threw the car hard around a corner, the back end fishtailing a bit as it took the corner at the high speed. The sedans followed closely. One of them crashed through the front patio of a sidewalk café, sending chairs, tables, and actor/patrons scattering in its wake. Next, she hopped the curb through a small park, sending a flock of pigeons flying away.  
  
It was getting time for the first stunt. She could see the trucks up at the top of the small hill she was about to climb, and floored the gas. Suddenly, she felt a bang as one of the chase cars slammed into her from the right side. Another one formed up on her right side, and the cars began to take turns smashing into her as they climbed the hill. Kitty kept her cool; this was just another part of the script.  
  
She hit the gas, pulling away from the two cars just as the first truck began to pull through the intersection. The truck was carrying a large pane of glass that was easily the length of the intersection. The back end of the glass pane was being held up by another truck about 5 feet off the ground. Kitty saw it growing closer and closer, and gave the car one last spurt of gas to help her clear the top of the hill. A few seconds later, she felt the car lift off, and she crashed head on through the giant piece of glass. Shards went flying everywhere as the chase cars followed through the glass shower. One of the cars tried to dodge the pieces as it jumped over the hill, and wound up taking a bad angle and crashing through the window of a storefront. The back end hung out of the window, its wheels spinning madly as its driver crawled out of the wreckage.  
  
Kitty could only imagine the footage and the angles being used for her stunts, but as far as she was concerned, she had the best seat in the house. She turned down a side street and headed for the freeway. This next stunt was going to require perfect timing.  
  
Logan sat next to Forest as they both rode in the helicopter that was filming the aerial footage for the scene. Logan was very nervous about what this particular stunt would involve; it was something he didn't think he'd be able to pull off without a LOT of practice, and Kitty had only had two days worth in the simulator. Even with that, she had only been able to land this stunt about half the time.  
  
Kitty zoomed towards the freeway on-ramp, the chase cars right on her bumper. She saw the semi-truck that was supposed to be her target. It looked like everything was in place. Here goes, she thought, and drove up the ramp at well over 100 mph.  
  
She launched into space, and landed on top of the semi's trailer just as it passed under the bridge. The car skidded along the roof of the trailer, drove down the cab, and landed on the freeway with a hard jolt. She heard the truck driver sound his horn in scripted shock as her car drove down the hood of his cab. Kitty lost control of the car as it landed and it spun out, stalling.  
  
She was very nearly clipped by an on-coming car as traffic began to back up behind the semi. Behind her, she saw the lead chase car attempt the same stunt, but it came up well short and crashed through the back of the semi. The second one, as scripted, played it smart and drove down the opposite on- ramp, heading straight for her.  
  
Back at the control tent, Lance watched the action as it was being filmed. To say he was impressed would have been a gross understatement. "Summers wouldn't even be able to pull THAT one off!" he said, feeling extremely lucky to have Kitty as his girlfriend.  
  
Kitty struggled to re-fire the engine. At the last second, she got it started and sped out of the way before the third car could ram her. The chase car did a 180 and resumed the pursuit.  
  
Kitty drove down the expressway, looking for the exit she was supposed to take leading to the next part of the scene. She saw it, but there was a problem; a tanker truck was in the lane between her and the exit, and at the speed she was going, there was no way she'd be able to make it unless.  
  
Forest and Logan watched nervously up in the helicopter. Forest had seen the tanker and was very worried that Kitty wouldn't be able to make to the exit. Suddenly, he saw Kitty's T-Bird veer towards the tanker. "What is she doing!" he shouted.  
  
Logan knew exactly what Kitty was doing, and grinned as Kitty drove beneath the oil tanker. She had just enough clearance that she wouldn't have to phase through it, which was a good thing since there was a camera pointed directly at her from the exit. She made it over and sped down the off-ramp, the chase car still in pursuit.  
  
Kitty swerved around corners and down alleys, trying to lose the last car. As scripted, it stuck with her, debris bouncing off its fenders as Kitty drove through stacks of newspapers and boxes to try and shake him off. She saw the entrance to a construction site and power-slid around the corner, her destination in site.  
  
She drove through the entrance of the site, breaking down the wooden fence that had been placed there. She slalomed around girders and construction equipment. Suddenly, she heard a shot ring out. As scripted, the last bunch of gangsters had grown impatient and had begun to shoot at her, with empty bullets of course. She heard the shots ricochet off her bumper and fly off every which way. One "bullet" struck a propane tank and it exploded (with a little help from the stunt crew), jumping into the air and nearly crashing into Kitty's car. The gangsters had to swerve to miss it, and kept following.  
  
Another "shot" went through the hood of a crane. It "hit" the driver in the chest, who "died" as scripted, falling onto the crane controls. The girder it had been hoisting came crashing down into a pre-dug ditch, sticking up in the air and forming a perfect ramp. Kitty aimed at it, ready to pull off her last stunt.  
  
Lance panicked when he saw the bullets start flying. "They're shooting at her!" he shouted. Several crewmen gave him a "Well, duh!" look, but one came up and reassured him. "Don't worry, kid, they're just blanks. Nothing's going to happen today unless we plan for it to happen," Lance relaxed a little, and went back to watching Kitty drive.  
  
Kitty drove straight up the girder without hesitation and landed back outside the construction site. Inside, the driver of the last car panicked and hit the brakes. He did not slow down in time, and the gangster car flew off the girder and landed inside a large cement mixer.  
  
"Brilliant!" cried Foster in triumph. "She got it in the can on the first take! I'll tell you something, Mr. Logan, you have a real gem on your hands! How'd you ever find her?"  
  
"Long story, bub," said Logan, thankful that the only things that had gotten blown up were the ones that were supposed to.  
  
Next time: An unexpected visitor crashes the party. Buckle up, this scene's just getting started! 


	6. Burnout

Disclaimer: Be sure to save your work every 10 minutes, just in case your computer crashes. I almost had to re-write this chapter from scratch. Oh, and I don't own any of the X-Men.  
  
Kitty pulled back up to the director's trailer as the filming helicopter touched down. The director rushed up to Kitty as she climbed out of the car and started pumping her hand madly. "That was remarkable! I'll win an Oscar for this!" he gushed.  
  
Logan walked up to her, giving her an intimidating stare. After a moment, a curl of a smile traced up his lips. "Good job, kid. Guess you're not such a bad driver after all,"  
  
"Gee, thanks," smiled Kitty.  
  
Lance was the next to offer his congratulations. "Kitty, I've never seen anything like that before in my life!"  
  
Before Kitty could respond, there was a scream as the director's trailer exploded into flames. Everybody turned to see Pyro standing on the roof of a blue pick-up truck, cackling madly. He sprayed another jet of fire around, sending the set workers running in panic.  
  
Crane stuck his head out of the driver's window. "You ruined my life, Kitty!" he shouted insanely. "Now we're going to burn down the whole city! Catch us if you can!" He hit the gas and took off.  
  
Kitty didn't hesitate one second. She started back to the car. Lance grabbed her by the shoulder as she started to climb in. "You can't go after him alone!" he warned.  
  
"I know what I'm doing!" she said, and slammed the door and drove off.  
  
Lance grit his teeth, and then ran to his own jeep. He saw that Logan was already sitting in the driver's seat. "You coming?" he asked.  
  
Lance glared at his enemy, and reluctantly got in the passenger's seat. Logan took off, barely waiting for Lance to fasten his seat belt.  
  
One of Foster's assistants looked over at him. "Sir, aren't you going to call security?"  
  
"Are you kidding?" Foster asked. "Start the cameras! This'll be even better than the first scene!"  
  
His assistant gulped, and ordered the cameras to start filming. Foster already had the helicopter and running, and took off to follow the three vehicles..  
  
Kitty drove after the pick-up, trying not to lose Crane. Despite her efforts to keep up, however, he had managed to elude her. As she tried to figure out where he had gone, Crane pulled out from an alley and closed in behind Kitty. On the roof, Pyro took careful aim with his flame hose. "This is too easy!" he shouted triumphantly, and fired.  
  
Kitty saw the flames closing in in her mirror just in time, and swerved over a lane. The fire singed the paint on her rear bumper, but didn't inflict any further damage. She swerved back as another flame jet shot past the side of her car. "Where is Lance?" she thought desperately.  
  
Logan and Lance saw the fire before they saw the truck. Logan pushed the jeep as fast as it would go, trying to catch up. Lance clenched his fist and groaned, using his powers to shake the ground. Up ahead, a phone pole tottered, and then fell over. Too late, Lance realized his mistake.  
  
Kitty saw the phone pole falling in front of her. She screamed as it crashed down onto the trunk of her car, lifting her front wheels off the ground. Behind her, Crane easily avoided the phone pole and kept closing.  
  
Logan turned angrily to Lance as he dodged the pole. "What are you tryin' to do, hotshot!"  
  
"I didn't see you doing anything!" Lance shot back angrily.  
  
Logan shot out his claws a few inches from Lance's throat. "Don't talk back to the driver!" he threatened. "Just let me take care of this, and no more heroics from you!"  
  
Lance glared at him but kept silent as Logan drove on. Logan brought the jeep up behind Crane and rammed into him.  
  
"Hey, be careful!" Lance protested.  
  
Another flash of the claws. "Do you wanna stop him or not? One more word and I'll throw you out myself!" Logan growled.  
  
Crane ignored Logan behind him and kept focusing on Kitty to allow Pyro to get a clear shot. As Pyro was getting ready to fire, Logan rammed the pick- up again, this time in his rear quarter-panel. Crane swerved to keep from spinning, and Pyro's shot went wild.  
  
Kitty saw the flame shoot way past her and engulf a billboard. The billboard tipped over onto the road and caught on fire. Both lanes were now blocked by the flaming mass of metal. Kitty simply phased the whole car through the billboard, no longer willing to refrain from using her powers.  
  
"Atta girl, Kitty," Logan said as he saw the car vanish through the billboard. "Take advantage of what you've got,"  
  
Crane didn't realize that Kitty had actually phased through the billboard. He thought that she had just driven through the burning wreckage. He did the same, forgetting momentarily about his passenger.  
  
Pyro screamed and dove into the bed of the truck as Crane crashed through the burning billboard. He pounded on the rear window, trying to get the driver's attention. "You almost got me killed, you idiot!"  
  
Crane was getting irritated. They should have gotten her by now. "You just do your job and let me do mine!" he shouted back. Pyro grumbled but got back onto the roof of the truck. "Time to get rid of those pests!" he said. He quickly turned and shot a flame jet back towards Logan and Lance. Logan could not avoid the fire in time, and the jeep's tires exploded simultaneously. The jeep rolled, skidding to a halt. Lance and Logan both crawled out, unhurt.  
  
"Thanks a lot! You just totaled my ride!" said Lance.  
  
"Shove it, bub!" Logan said, running over to a parked motorcycle as Lance stared at his ruined jeep. Logan started up the bike and took back off after Crane. Lance pulled out his cell phone and dialed a few numbers, and when he heard, "911" on the other side, he explained to the dispatchers everything that was going on.  
  
Kitty drove on, trying to find some way to get rid of Crane. Several blocks up ahead, she could see one of the bridges over the river starting to rise. There were two buildings on either side of the bridge, connected by a narrow catwalk. She made a quick guess on the trajectory and realized that this chase would very shortly be over.  
  
Logan closed up rapidly behind the pick-up on the motorcycle. He dodged 2 jets of flame, and then jumped off of the bike, landing beside Pyro. He growled at Pyro as he shot out his claws. "End of the line, bub!" Before Pyro could react, Logan slashed at him, severing the hoses that ran to Pyro's backpack.  
  
"No!" Pyro screamed and lashed out wildly at Logan. They grappled in the back of the truck as Kitty led Crane on towards the bridge.  
  
Kitty hit the bridge just as it was fully open. Her car rocketed off the bridge and hurtled towards the catwalk. At the last second, she phased both herself and the car through the glass structure, and the T-Bird landed safely on the other side of the bridge.  
  
Logan realized Kitty's plan as he saw her car go up the bridge, and he broke free from Pyro's grip. "Have a nice trip, bub!" he said, and jumped out of the truck. He hit the ground rolling, and got up in time to see the truck shoot off of the bridge.  
  
Crane blindly followed Kitty up the bridge, not even seeing the catwalk until it was too late. He and Pyro screamed together as the truck crashed through the glass, lodging itself inside the corridor. Pyro emerged from the ruined truck and leaned his head through the driver's window. "Sorry, mate," he said to Crane, who was pinned behind the steering wheel. "This is where we part ways," he said, and ran off. A few moments later, four police officers ran up to the jeep, wondering just how they were going to explain this to their captains.  
  
Epilogue:  
  
Kitty sat on the steps of the courthouse, dejectedly. The judge had thrown the book at Foster for hiring an underage stunt-driver, and had held him completely responsible for all the damage that had ensued from chasing Pyro. He had thrown Crane in jail of course, but that was little consolation. Foster was bankrupt and had to cancel the movie, meaning that Kitty's fledgling career in pictures had taken a significant detour. In addition, the judge had placed Kitty on probation from driving until she was 21. When Kitty asked the judge how she was going to get to school and around town, the judge had sarcastically told her to get a pair of roller blades, and left the chambers.  
  
As she sat moping, Lance pulled up to the sidewalk in a brand new jeep. He got out of the car and sat down next to Kitty.  
  
"Hi," she said, unenthusiastically.  
  
"Hi," he said. "Look, I'm sorry about the cops arresting you and everything. I just didn't want Pyro blowing up the city, ya know? I didn't mean for everything else to happen," he said.  
  
"I know," she said forgivingly. "Maybe this is for the best," " Then, she noticed Lance's new jeep. "How'd you get a new ride so fast?" she asked.  
  
"I, uh, borrowed Pietro's credit card," Lance said. Actually, he had stolen the card while Pietro had been sleeping. He doubted that Pietro would even realize what had happened until he got his bill.  
  
"Cool," said Kitty. "You're lucky to have a new jeep. I'm really gonna miss driving. Stupid judge! I hate roller skates!"  
  
Lance felt sorry for Kitty. "Wanna go for a ride, for old time's sake?" he asked.  
  
"You mean it?" Kitty asked, perking up.  
  
"Sure," said Lance.  
  
"Won't we get in trouble?" she asked, giving him a coy look. "Only if they catch us," Lance said, giving her an equally coy look in return.  
  
"You're on!" Kitty laughed and got into the jeep. "Hang on!" she said, and they took off in a big cloud of dust that briefly took the shape of an X before fading away.  
  
The End  
  
Coming soon: I'm going to write a couple more short, funny stories before I gear up for some more serious writing. Look for a game of hockey, X-Men style, and a game of Dungeons and Dragons as only the Brotherhood can play it. Ta! 


End file.
